i honestly

feel dead. :l
it's like i've got nothing to look forward to.
nothing to strive for anymore.
i've given up on everything, haha.
maybe one of these days i'll find something..
something that i have the slimmest chance of attaining.

i'm slowly turning back into my old self.
solitary, blunt, and serious in all aspects..
it's weird.
change was good, but i'd prefer being individualistic again; saves me alot of stress/hurt/etc.

if i had my way; everything would just fuck off.
fuck college, fuck the sun, fuck the sky, fuck me, fuck you.
fuck, everything.

nothing means anything anymore.

just

about ready to give up.

i'm really, really, really patient.
i just.. "can't wait forever".
haha.
wise words stefan, wise words.

i wanna curl up and just.. fall asleep for ever.

mm..

i like my mood. :)
today has been good, full of laughs.
ups and downs, the usual.
bring on the weekend, yeahhhhhhh?

I'll believe it all
There's nothing I won't understand
I'll believe it all
I won't let go of your hand

x

smilessss :)

i sung to them.

i phoned them.

i adored their voice.

i adored their laugh. (oo, creepy ;D)

even better, i made them laugh, LOL.

i LOVEDDDDDDD them.

night! :) x

p.s. - WILL SMITH IS THE SHIT!

darling..

are you lost my dear? tell me, are you cold?

do you hide fears, still left untold?

you want to change, but just can't break the mould.

so here i stretch, an open hand

please grab a-hold, we can leave this land

my porcelain doll, unscathed skin

you bring out my devil within

englightening, to these gloomy eyes

you unmask my greatest lies

untouched feelings, i back away

i'll save my words for a distant day

i'll exhaust myself;

here i lay

for i would rather play it cool

i will not over-flatter, and look a fool

just know my love, i can see inside you

come at me full-throttle, i wouldn't stop you

i know the pain you keep locked up

i could help you

but to break your will would make me corrupt

i am no one; you will not miss me

i dream each night for unattainable bliss, see?

unrivalled idiocy, you cannot imagine

but i can be smart; i can be smart for you

a good day today.

david, you idiot.

Tonight we drink to youth

And holding fast to truth

I don't want to lose what I had as a boy

My heart still has a beat

But love is now a feat

as common as a cold day in LA

Sometimes when I'm alone I wonder

Is there a spell that I am under

Keeping me from seeing the real thing

Love hurts..

But sometimes it's a good hurt

And it feels like I'm alive

Love sings

When it transcends the bad things

Have a heart and try me

'Cause without love I won't survive.

I'm fettered and abused

Stand naked and accused

Should I surface this one man submarine

I only want the truth

So tonight we drink to youth

I'll never lose what I had as a boy

Sometimes when I'm alone, I wonder

Is there a spell that I am under

Keeping me from seeing the real thing

Love hurts..

But sometimes it's a good hurt

And it feels like I'm alive

Love sings

When it transcends the bad things

Have a heart and try me

'Cause without love I won't survive

Love hurts, oh

Love hurts..

Without love I won't survive

Love hurts, oh

Without love I won't survive

break.

me.